Standard.
I’ll never hear from him again.
Stew called last night to tell me Waldo had died. It was a day we expected would come sooner rather than later when we picked him up in the middle of an unprecedented Carolina snowstorm.
He was old, sure. After all, ten years will put a few miles on an old dog. But what aged him, unfortunately, weren’t years of life but years of horrendous neglect and abuse.
He was quiet, so quiet, on that snowy ride home from the rescue house. He’d been pulled from a high-kill shelter and just needed a foster home for two weeks before heading to a no-kill shelter in DC. I think all of us knew he would never have to go. He was ours instantly.
I watched his sweet white face from the passenger seat, black scars across his snout and two-thirds of a mangled ear hanging as a reminder of where he’d been. I hate people.
Mankind had given this dog no reason to trust us. And yet there he was, calmly sitting in the backseat taking it all in, either completely defeated or, I like to think, hopeful that maybe, just maybe, this time would be different.
He farted the whole way home. Nerves, we laughed.
WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS
The cats weren’t so sure about him at first but eventually moved from rejection to tolerance, the closest emotion to love a cat can express.
We spoiled the hell out of that fat, smelly old dog. He spent most of his time like this:
Shmeeeeeee
HAHA
In exchange, he “guarded the house” (and by this I mean he slept through every noise because he was old and deaf) and kept us delightfully entertained.
A rare moment of alertness.
And for my next trick... I will fart again.
Whatever, man.
He was always Stew’s dog. No question. So when we split up, the fact that he would have full custody was never even discussed. It just happened, and it was right. I know those first few months were miserable for me, and though we never talked about it, I think Waldo was a source of comfort for Stew at an equally hard time.
He and I haven’t really communicated in the year since the breakup so last night when I saw a missed call from a number I just can’t seem to un-memorize, I knew exactly what it was.
From what I can tell, we’re both in really good spots right now. Next week he’ll go on the annual beach trip we used to take with someone new and a week later I’ll do the same. Waldo was really the last remaining thread that kept us tied ever so loosely. It’s the most ultimate and bittersweet kind of closure there is.
I think Stew is dwelling on the final few hours when he had to make the heart-wrenching decision to put him down. It’s something I could never do, and my heart really breaks for him. But I hope, when he’s got a little more distance from that day, that he can focus instead on the nearly two years of life and love he added to that poor old dog’s existence.
If ever you have the opportunity to adopt a rescue dog, please do. It sounds cliche but I assure you that after a few days you’ll begin to question who really saved whom. Waldo gave us more than we could ever give him. What a wonderful little life.
Rest in peace, Waldito. We loved you so much.
Beautiful post. I’m all teary at work now! But seriously, thank you for sharing.
…blubbering in a coffee shop in the middle of Philly (not the most sensitive place to be watery eye’ed over your computer). My heart goes out to you guys.
RIP Waldo. I am so happy that he got to spend the last portion of his life in a loving home. Hugs.
<3. Waldo was adorable. I have a rescue at home, too, named Charlie Brown and he is just a big pile of love.
Ok, I’m totally bawling at work now. Thank you pregnancy hormones! You guys did an awesome thing adopting him and I know you both made Waldo’s life better. Love you.
Trying to hold in tears. There’s nothing like losing a dog, we lost our family dog last year. Waldo was so lucky to have you both in the short time you did.
I don’t know if you saw this, but we actually just rescued a sweet girl from the Humane Society on Saturday, officially. I’ll love on her extra tonight, for Waldo.
Volunteering for an animal shelter has simultaneously renewed my hatred for humanity and my faith in humanity. We are a complicated, shitty species.
As someone who grew up with a dog, I can definitely understand the inexplicable, unconditional, insane love one can have for these buddies.
I’m not a religious person and I don’t believe in an afterlife, but for some reason I maintain that there’s a heaven for animals, where they play and eat snacks all day. Maybe you can think about Waldo being there, too.
*hugs*
I don’t think anything upsets me more than an animal being abused or passing away. That poor, sweet dog breaks my heart. I’m glad he was able to enjoy the last few years of his life in a warm and loving home.
Side note: I don’t know how people have the strength to put their pet down. I seriously don’t think I’d ever be able to do that with my cat – the mere thought makes me bawl.
RIP Waldo <3
We put down the family dog a few years ago. I think that, at a certain point, your unconditional love and empathy connect with your brain, and you realize that euthanization is the most humane, loving act you can do for your pet.
We fed her a huge steak before the vet trip. The vet gave us as much time as we wanted. She warned us that there may be involuntary muscle spasms and gasping as bodily systems shut down, but we experienced none of that. She literally went to sleep in my mom’s arms, surrounded by her family. I hope that I can pass half as peacefully as she did.
Give your cat a big hug when you get home. I hope you two have many more happy years together
I’m sure she enjoyed her huge steak.
And you’re right – it’s far better to see a pet go peacefully than to watch them suffer. Your pup undoubtedly passed happy and comforted.
I’ll make sure to hug her and shower her with kisses. <3
It’s the hardest thing to put a pet down. I was part of the decision-making process with my parents when our Siberian husky was sick. She had Cushing’s syndrome and held on for two years after her diagnosis; when we decided we had to put her down, it was really to help her along. She couldn’t even lift her head that morning and we just knew that she would die within the next 48 hours, so we called the vet (amazing, amazing people who sent us the more heartbreakingly touching card after) and brought her in. I was out of state when it came to that point with my golden retriever, but I know it was the same thing–the end was in sight, and we thought it was best to bring it about peacefully. My dad held her the whole time so she was never alone. Ah, now I’m getting all weepy.
RIP Waldo. Katie, I know how hard this is–so sorry.
Poor baby.
That breaks my heart. I’m happy she was surrounded by people that loved her.
aw, so sorry to hear that
Taters, Love you lady. So true, all of it, and so honest. Bug and I send our best to you. xo
Tater, this post just made me ball at my desk. I didn’t know Waldo, but I remember what you’ve shared with me and I’m sad for both of you. I hope that he’s somewhere better than this cruel-to-dogs world. Thank goodness he had you and Stew to pamper and love him.
Really nice post, Tater. Makes me want to go love on Beller dog. She’s still mad at you for calling her a weird little human. RIP Waldo and Clancy, two old men. Good thing “all dogs gonna happen.” hahaha I hope you know what I’m talking about.
This post totally brought me to tears. Nothing makes me more mad than people who are cruel to animals, but you guys did a really good thing spoiling Waldo for the last couple years of his life. I can’t even fathom having to make the decision to put down one of my dogs, but at some point, I think it’s the most humane, kind thing you can do for them. There’s no need for them to suffer unnecessarily.
This was a really nice tribute to Waldo, and those pictures are priceless.
What a beautiful post! I’m sorry for your loss! Rescue animals are amazing! All of my cats (5 total) I rescued
Seriously beautiful post. And another person crying in public here.
Feeling for ya, Katie, the same way I do in most of your posts…My rescue pup means the world to me and it’s just so hard to comprehend how people can feel anything but absolute love towards innocent animals. You and Stew did such a beautiful thing for Waldo, and that’s a great thing to look back on from your relationship. Like you said, closure at its finest. I’m sure Waldo is sending plenty of love back your way from his puppy heaven
Thanks, Katie
Beautiful tribute to Waldo (and your relationship). My heart goes out to you and Stew. You are all fortunate to have had each other, if only for a few years. I’m so sorry for your loss. Hugs.
P.S. I couldn’t believe more strongly in the who saved whom cliche.
Breaks my heart to hear this but i know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you and Stew were guardian angels for this wonderful lad. What a great thing you did for him and how much love you reaped from him, yep even the cats. love you tater.
Lovely.
My current pup is a rescue from the Humane Society, and I would do anything for her.
Sadly, I put down my 10 year old Kensie back in 2008… and I still think of her every day.
This hit close to home in every way.
RIP Waldo.
Thinking of you, and my own furry loves that have passed on.
Tater, I am so sorry for Waldo and your loss. I was always thankful that his final years were good ones. You know this crushes my heart, but I know he is in a good place, over the Rainbow Bridge. (with Smelley, Gracie, Cowboy, Gunnar, Clancy and the guinea pig Juju dropped down the stairs). I couldn’t resist, Ju. Laughter among tears, the greatest emotion.
Stew, Thanks for stepping in and being a great dad to the old guy. You did a good thing.
aaahaha, RIP minniepig.
thanks, mom.
Made me cry. I love animals so much and hate ppl
Oops… I hate ppl for hurting them. RIP Waldo
lol. could’ve left it at “i hate people.” i hear you.
awww, this is the most bittersweet, heart-breaking, yet warming post! While I am sad for Waldo & the horrible things that were done to him, I am so thankful he was in a loving home for the rest of his life. The pictures that made me smile the most are him on his back, showing his tummy. It shows that he trusted you & Stew enough to proudly show his belly, his most vulnerable spot, & know that he would be safe.
*big hugs*
yes! you’re not the first person to point out that picture. i hadn’t really thought of it but it definitely is a pose of total trust and surrender. sweet old guy.
I am so sorry to hear about Waldo! I am crying even reading the comments! When I moved home from Denver our old sheepdog Sam gave me a few days to cuddle and then my parents made the heart wrenching decision to put him down, the vet came to our house and he was put down in our yard being held by my(our) parents! I am grateful the samnugget gave me a few days with him and they always say ” the life of a good dog is never long enough”
aw, so sweet.
on a side note… we call my little sister juju. always have, always will.
Annddd now I’m crying. Thanks for a beautiful post and for saving Waldo.
On another note…is that a Totoro hat he is wearing? Because if so, that is freaking awesome.
yes!
I am so sorry for your loss. I volunteer with animal rescue and I know the joy and comfort animals can bring. I never understand why humans hurt animals, makes me sick. Very happy you helped bring him happiness in his life (and he obviously brought a lot to yours).
His energy is with you, the spirit never dies, it keeps loving and being there~
This made me cry! So sweet, you two gave him an amazing end and beginning to his life. Love your blog